Monday, 26 March 2012

The Unseen Bruises

The Unseen Bruises

Today's cloudless blue sky hid her pain,
she displayed a sunny disposition but her eyes hid the rain,
Pathetic fallacy is rendered meaningless.

Demeaning stares, but she triumphantly smiles to hide the bleakness,
Not wanting to depict her emotion - a sign of weakness,
A hollow victory nonetheless.

Emotional blackmail kept her at bay,
"Beggars can't be Choosers" is what they used to say,
So she's Waking up to an abyss.

There was a life-scarring storm before an everlasting calm,
Day-dreams brought about thoughts of self-harm,
Sharp words & internal bleeding.

The Sleeping beauty tormented by her dreams,
Nightmares trapped her intermittent screams,
Even Escapism offered her no exit.

Pregnancy was her respite,
A short prelude to the rest biting
Back to emotional agony.

The blessing of a new life,
The metamorphosis from wife to mother,
But the Butterflies colour was temporary.

The first adopted the wrong genes, showing her disdain,
Confused by the betrayal, she struggled to stay sane,
Torn apart to shreds but not one bruise.

She craved the silver lining to her cloud,
surrounded by a crowd but she never felt more alone,
some suffer in silence, some suffer out-loud.

Suffering patiently hoping for an end.
Enough was enough. Too tired to Pretend,

The Naked eye simply saw the body,
"No bruises" - perplexed onlookers pondered.

The Post Mortem never detected her broken soul.

Monday, 12 March 2012

Me, My Ego and I

You pierce the esteemed I.
With your disapproving gaze
You damage my insecurity proof vest
and leave me torturing myself in various ways.

But I'm still in awe of You.
My sycophantic rants should not stress you,
don't think my self-hating speak is formed to berate you
I simply seek an outlet for Us.

Some seek betterment,
but you simply think you're better than, me.
Why assume a higher position?
Leaving me on the death bed seeking a spiritual physician?

You always seem to build yourself up
sky-high, you've probably seen the stars
but not the space,
(a)voiding the fact that you're obsessed with Uranus

You shrug at the lack of light
but the birds eye view you occupy
gave you the lofty perspectives of the grim night
And what is the truth to a brilliant lie?

nothing, You are
even dwarfing yourself,
even Self is astounded by the fact
that you scarcely see nothing else

The inner me wants more
but your insatiable desire
makes me think "What For?"
I choose victory in perpetual war

I almost made peace with me
I hope The One witnesses this,
but You convinced me This was bliss,
and I'm left bewildered with you.

As I look in the reflection
The warts of my soul are evident
my gnostic body suffers infection
I look at you and all I see is arrogant decadence

This mustn't be you
This can't be me.
But as a great poet once said:
"Between the mirror and the heart
is this single difference:
the heart conceals secrets,
while the mirror does not."